Big Bank Blues

Every now and then I've just got to blow off a little steam as a result of being beat down by big business. I usually don't feel this way unless I've experienced really, really bad customer service and it usually has to happen on more than one occasion to make me spout off.

Although, I recognized awhile back that Bank of America was not a good deal for my small graphic design business and have since moved my account to a Credit Union (Arizona State Credit Union) who treats me like a person and actually pays interest on the money I have in my checking account! Unfortunately, Matt and I still have our home/personal debit/checking, safe deposit box with BofA. The last couple of days dealing with them have been annoying. What's driving me over the edge is this: I went to the bank to deposit a check in the ATM. The ATM sucked down my check and then proceeded to have a "run time error" (a.k.a. crappy "we don't give a crap" software) and CRASH. "No problemo" I thought to myself in spanish--I'll go in and let them know so they can pull out my check and desposit it. Still in good spirit I told one of the worker bees my story and their face turned to stone. I was told "We don't have access to the ATM. You'll just have to wait and see if is deposited to your account and if it doesn't then you'll need to call and file a claim". I must have had a look of disbelief as the whole "YOU have to do something--because it can't be OUR problem" scenario was repeated to make sure I understood.

Still optomistic that it would show up and someone would recognize there was a computer crash and maybe not all the checks were processed....

Yeah, right... I e-mailed BofA first and got a totally bogus form e-mail that didn't even take into account the issue. I'm suppose to report check fraud?? It's not check fraud--"it's my "f@#% ing" bank ATM check sucking etc. etc."--I thought to myself.

Then I tried to call... What a joke that is. You get into a continuous automated loop with NO option to speak to a real person in India (I'm sure even BofA is on the outsourcing band wagon). Now I'm just MAD. I certainly would not have the check writer request a stop pay because that would cost them money. Why should they? Clearly this is my banks bad business flaw.

So tomorrow I'll wait for the reply to my e-mail (They respond in 12 hours) where I think I used all caps and said something like "Give me the number where I can talk to a person that can actually answer questions without pissing me off more and tell me where all those checks collected from the ATM's go..."

We've had our share of Big Bank Blues and luckily we're already in the process of transferring to a credit union for our personal accounts. Can't be soon enough for me. Of all businesses--a bank needs to be trusted. I have no trust in BofA .

Looking for a place to park your bucks? My suggestion is to see what credit union you can join up with. They haven't forgotten who they work for and they can offer up services that the Big Banks do. No one should ever park their $$ somewhere without a little appreciation--whether it's by getting a little interest on your money or providing good service.

Muffin "e" Goodness...

Mmmmmmmm, nothing better than a muffin right out of the sunoven. Warm, moist and satisfying. Did I mention how amazigly good for you these babies are? I made up my own recipe and they are low cal & low fat. Not to mention I used FREE energy from the sun to cook them. My sun oven's up to 375 degrees today and still working. I threw in some garlic heads to make a garlic paste for slathering on all sorts of my "granola crunchie" goodies.

I'm omitting oil and such from my recipes as I'm testing out the Dean Ornish philosphy of super low fat cooking, healthy heart etc. He actually promotes a heart healthy diet through Vegetarian-lowfat cooking. Check out his Everyday Cooking with Dr. Dean Ornish-150 Easy. Low-Fat High Flavor Recipes. Lots of good recipes in there. He gets NO credit for my muffins. They're my own lowfat creation.

I'm always willing to share a good thing so here's my recipe that makes 6 muffins (can't fit a 12 pan in my Sunoven):

1/4 cup unsweetened applesauce
1/4 cup egg substitute
1/4 cup plus one Tablespoon Non Fat, plain yogurt.
1/4 cup Splenda
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1.5 bananas mashed
1 cup whole wheat flour
1 tsp baking soda
1 1/2 tsp Cinnamon

I threw in some Craisins but you can pretty much put in whatever fruit you'd like (Ok--maybe not grapefruit!). Strawberries, blueberries etc. My disclaimer: Cooking in a sunoven ALWAYS makes everything more moist. I usually have to cook things a little longer as well. I cooked these for 25 minutes. If cooking in a conventional oven, you may want to check them around 20 minutes. Unlike the sunoven--if you overcook them they will be a little dry. And if you live in a sunny place I highly recommend getting a Sunoven. They're great when you don't want to heat up your house in the summer, not to mention the energy savings. Everything comes out moist and delicious! Enjoy!

Here's my quick add up of the stats per/muffin:
133 calories
2 g fat
20 carbs
2 g fiber
1 g protein
0 g cholesterol

Teetotalism Times Two...

Well it's been over two weeks now that I've managed to abstain from my glass of wine per night habit. Good stuff, but I was starting to wonder if the habit was permanent. So I'm practicing alcohol abstinence for awhile as a way to break the habit and make a glass of wine more for special occasions and not an everyday thing. I'm on a roll, so we'll see how long I go before I cave. I am married afterall!

It's interesting how other's react when I ask for a Diet Coke or a glass of water when out to dinner. For some reason I'm questioned as to why I'm not drinking and I have to explain. I can't recall ever asking someone why they chose something other than alcohol for their beverage, but if I have--I'm sorry for that. There is really no reason one should have to justify a non alcoholic choice. No one ever asks why one chews sugar-free gum.

So far I've learned that it's pretty easy to skip alcohol, so I don't think I'll have to attend an AA session anytime soon.
Just don't take my coffee away... or someone is going to get hurt!

Cheers! I say that affectionately with my glass of skim milk.

Home Improvements Update

There was a little Weekend Warrior action in my kitchen over the past couple of weekends. A couple weeks ago my Uncle Steve cut and installed the molding on the tops of my cabinets. I was suppose to help, but he certainly didn't need it. In fact, I had bought extra because I was sure that if I did it there would be mistakes. Not my Uncle Steve... he calculated each cut and it all installed perfectly. Thank you Uncle Steve! Also a big thank you to my Aunt Jill for coming along and bringing lunch!

This past weekend I spiced up the back splash with some tile. It's amazing how a little texture, pattern and color spiff up the place. My trusty tiling coworker and neighbor, Tom, helped me out with this one. It's the first time both of us tiled "on the point" so we had to do quite a bit more thinking and lots of cuts. I'm glad we went that route though--because it definitely adds more interest. Tom had to endure quite a bit of "nit picking" but he was a trooper and let me be boss "e". Thank you Tom! I'm sure I would STILL be doing this project if it weren't for your help.

We had a rough start with some mechanical problems and I had to do some drywall repair after taking off the previous Silestone partial back splash. I can attest to the durability and strength of Silestone. It took quite a few hammer wacks to get it to break. So my good intentions of starting to tile on Saturday morning turned into late Saturday afternoon. Tom and I had to stick a tile on the wall just to feel like we accomplished something. Sunday we cruised and got the whole back wall and some of the side wall done. We finished it up on Monday and this morning I grouted it and put most of the outlet cover back on.

Not including our time, both the cabinet moldings and the tile were about $700 for materials. After I take all the molding back my Uncle Steve didn't use it will be about $650. So for not alot of money, I'm really happy with the result.

Next up... cork flooring in my spare bedroom to hide the disappointing contracted out cement acid stain. NO Thank You's are going out to Syntec Concrete Coatings for that. The only thing they did was reaffirm that I can usually complete my own home improvements and do a better job. Cork was my plan B and learning more about it--I think it should have been my plan A (By the way eD--I bought the material from Floorshop.com which I learned about from your blog).

AND after cork flooring... I suppose I better start on the spare bathroom that has been gutted. I've been using it as a closet for all my tools.

Masters Sculling Camp

Last weekend I spent some time on Pacific Beach in my scull attending Patti Pinkerton's Master's rowing camp. Wish I had some photos but the camera got left at home as all the worry about what to pack-made me forget "what to PACK". Besides the camera, I think at least 4 or 5 more pairs of socks would have been helpful. Regardless, sculling alongside seals, sunny skis and along with the best coaching tips I've received thus far... I would say it's a "MUST" for any sculler that wants to improve one's skills.

I rode out with Julie Busskohl who car-topped my boat and rode home with the spouse who came out on Saturday to work by the beach. We had a nice time meeting up after my day of sculling instruction. Going out for a light dinner and walk along the beach. Matt & I had spent a month or so in a condo along Pacific Beach 3 years ago. It was kind of cool to scull by it and to just hang out in the area again.

As for Patti Pinkerton, I can say that I felt honored and lucky to get some coaching from her. She has a long list of accomplishments behind her and truly KNOWS how to relay her thoughts to get you to make changes for the better. Great coach and a lively personality. I'm going back next year for sure!

They ARE way smarter than dogs....

My way-to-many cats never stop amusing me. So bossy, yet SENSITIVE and most of all... they have "no fear". Here's a few pictures that may relay my thoughts...


Chili & Pepper go together.... well, like Chili Pepper!


Sparky is our "no fear" kitty. If there's a high spot he MUST go to the top. If there's something to be explored then he'll be there. To this day... I have to DOUBLE check the washer machine to make sure he's not in it before starting the wash cycle.

Ok, maybe that's not so smart--but I certainly would call it brave!

I Resolve...

About my New Year's resolution...

Last year it was to walk to the grocery store and to places in general that were within walking distance. Last night, I finally figured out what this year's resolution would be while WALKING to the grocery store. You see I was walking to the store to get some needed ingredients for a new soup recipe I had. Then I thought "I should try more new recipes" and then I thought "Violé!". So I decided I need to try one new vegetarian recipe a week. In turn it will help me to be a better vegetarian and not rely on the usual trap I fall into when needing a quick meal--pasta or fish. Because I don't plan meals like I shoud I've been a pesco vegetarian. I'm not sure that's such a good thing as it becomes convenient to use fish as my primary protein source. This year-- I'm going to be a better planner and fix totally vegan meals and figure out which ones are keepers or that I can take to dinners where there's not much of a chance for a real vegetarian choice.

By the way, it was a fabulous soup from Vegetarian Times which was wicked easy and delicious. Loved that so much--I'm testing out another recipe tonight opposite the soup recipe page.

If you're up for a vege meal every now and then--let me know--I'm sure I'll be able to let you in on the ones I've tried that are "keepers".

Bon Apetite!

p.s. I get harassed by people almost on a daily basis because I am vegetarian and I still get stupid questions like "Do you eat Chicken?" That one still amazes me. I suppose I might deserve it as I break down and eat fish just to avoid the questions during dinner outings. Diet for a Small Plant is always a good read and it might surprise you how much our eating choices impact our planet. A bit dated now--but prophetic considering how much our planet has changed since the book was written in the 70's.
Certainly, I don't inflict my eating choices on others, but if I could get others to consider just going vegetarian for one night a week-- well... a little goes a long way.

Christmas Last Year...

Oh my... I'm just now putting some Christmas Day pictures up and it's already a New Year. Happy New Year everyone!
I'm still thinking about whether I'll make a resolution for this year. Walking to the grocery store was last year. I think I did a pretty good job with that--although I think I could do better.

Here's a few pictures of Christmas Day dinner at Dan & Karen's brand spanking new house with brand new everything. Quite posh I must say. I know many of you want to see the house, however, I didn't do a good job as the lighting was a bit low both outside and inside. Part of the appeal of a new house is being able to dim lights for mood lighting. Not so great for my still amateur photography skills... sorry! To see the other photos CLICK HERE


This view is from the back patio looking into the main room. You can see through to the door in the front.


Matt Sr. and neighbor Tom testing out the backyard grill.


Dan and Karen's house has a really nice view of Camelback mountain from the patio.


Neighbor, Jan and Aunt Jonni in the kitchen.


Dan giving out instructions on how to correctly roll crescent rolls out of the can. He's the pro at that.

It's the Little Things...

Like a cozy place and a homemade quilt to nap on. Picture below was taken at Kobi's favorite other home (Tom & Jan's next door). Merry Christmas!

Backyard Birds

This morning it's crisp, cool and beautful outside as the dewdrops are shining in the early morning sun. Our mornings are filled with some backyard activity thanks to our interesting metal bird feeder and some wild bird feed. Matt has been going out and putting bird see in it every morning and after that our backyard transforms into birdie mecca! The cat's especially love the close-up view and are mesmerized by the activity.


Freshly filled bird feeder.


It's not long before there's a flock of quail stuffing themselves.


Sparky looking out... wishing he could be out and having a quail breakfast!


A Cardinal in our Ocotillo getting ready to kick some Quail butt to get the bird seed.


And here's a little bird waiting to get in on the food fest.

You're On the Right Blog

I've changed to a minimalist look for a little while while I contemplate the meaning of Christmas... I'll get back to you on that and maybe I'll have some pictures that will add all the color needed.

Uh oh....

I knew it would happen--I just didn't know it would happen this fast. That's right kids--the big 40 is just around the corner for me. Two days to be exact. I've decided that I should maintain a low profile and let it be like any other day. In fact, I've scheduled in my "well woman exam" for my birthday. How much fun can that be!

I don't normally blog without some type of image to go along with it, however, I just don't have an image... well at least not one to portray my current train of thought.

40.... people say that's middle age. I have noticed a few more wrinkles and the desire to retire early... like tomorrow. But other than that--I just don't feel like 40. In fact, it's got me thinking about what I could do to keep feeling like I'm not 40. Rowing is keeping me active and has been inspirational. So many of my rowing friends are older than me and they look great. Into their late 40's, 50's 60's and going on 70's they defy the norm. For sure, I'm holding onto the sport. And maybe I might add a few more...

Consciousness... Now I'm even more intent on using plastic baggies more than 3 times and recycling as much as possible. Living lightly on the earth is a major goal and not doing so is a concern. I question those that need to have more things and I look up to and admire those that are simplifying.

Health... in my 20's and 30's I worked out to keep from buying larger pants. In my late 30's and soon to be 40's I'm working out because I've discovered it actually makes me both mentally and physically younger. I'm counting on my activities and sports to get me through what I've felt will happen at some point--being diagnosed. It's no secret in my family that the cancer gene runs rampant. Staying true to my sports gives me hope that I might outrun "it". And if I can't, then at least I'll be strong enough to fight it.

Family... I don't know that I should even want to continue on to 50, 60 and beyond without them. My first real loss was losing my grandparents within a year of each other. I still miss them dearly . And despite sometimes differing veiwpoints-I might crumble without the rest of my family.

Friends... I'm not always the best friend. Neglecting to write, e-mail or call. However, my friends understand and I understand them when they are to harried to keep in touch. We never lose track of each other in mind and spirit and when we reconnect--it's as if only a day or two had passed by. They've all turned 40 before me and I'm sure they're quite happy that I've caught up to them again.

Marriage... Many my age have found that the first one didn't work out for them by 40. I feel lucky to have married for the first and last time. My best buddy and my best friend--Matt keeps me young on a day to day basis with good humor and lots of support. Even when I don't make enough money--so he can quit his job--he forgives me and takes another smack from corporate america so we can live in relative comfort.

So my friends... 40 isn't so bad for "e". I've got a good attitude, good life and good health.

Here's to 40 and beyond!

Living in the "Hood"

The pictures below are the result of some vandals in our neighborhood on Saturday night or Sunday morning....
I suspect it's from rock slinging (with a sling-shot by the damage that was done). A peice of evidence was left for us.
Unfortunately, we have teenagers with friends in our neighborhood. My guess is that they have to much free time and a curfew that isn't enforced enough to keep them from getting bored. Nor have they learned consequences. Quite a bit of damage as they managed to dent the car as well as break the glass.

My neighbors Tom and Jan got a stray flying rock that broke a tile off their roof. Today I'll be making an insurance claim and likely a police report as well.


Likely this was the source of the damage.


The tempered glass is one tap away from shattering everywhere.


One impact point that dented the car.


Another impact point on the back of the hatchback.

Marathon Picture Page

As promised I've uploaded my rowing marathon pictures. CLICK HERE to view the page.

Natchitoches Rowing Marathon

I'm back in town after completion of my first on the water rowing marathon. We had a great time in this cool little town. The marathon was action packed with 24 crew eights competing. I think this may have been their biggest participation year yet as they ran out of T-shirts!

The Cane River made for an "attentive" row. Lots of winding curves and unfortunately some 20 mph (seemed like more in my scull) headwinds and at times crosswinds. The night before there was a big storm and the temperature dropped 20 degrees. Lots of tree limbs were hanging out in the river. I actually snagged one and afterwards was more cautious and tried to stay towards the middle of the river.

My goal was to finish the marathon in 4 hours, however, after fighting the wind for the first 10 miles, I decided finishing upright would be a more realistic goal. I finished in 4:43 minutes and I was unchallenged in my master's class. My boat number was #9 and so I thought the gal that started in front of me and had bow #8 was in my class. We went back and forth passing each other for the first 23 miles and then I realized that she looked really, really young for her age. Come to find out she was a college gal and not even in my class.

Kathy and Rebecca kicked some serious butt. They rowed so well that despite high winds--they still managed to set a course record in the Women's Master A class. I was so proud of them! During the course of the race there was a college men's 2X that stopped to take a rest when they caught up to me. I saw Kathy and Rebecca in the distance and told them that 2 girls were about to pass them up. That got them rowing! It's kinda fun to bring down those young kids huge egos for entertainment. I have no doubt that Kathy and Rebecca eventually passed them up.

Dave did great too. It's really hard to row a single in the wind and he took a beating from it. He jokingly said he should have quit at the 12 mile mark... but we know he wouldn't have. His family and friends were there and they were so wonderful. They whisked our boats away and unrigged them after the race and helped set up before. My M-I-L Wanda made the trip with me and was my "pit crew" so to speak. She drove me everywhere and knew the town like the back of her hand within a day. Plus she braved cold winds to shoot some pictures from the Front Street bridge. It certainly wouldn't have been as much fun without her. AND most importantly, she somehow tricked me into eating tomatoes. Fried green tomatoes! Anyone that knows me knows how I feel about raw tomatoes so this was a major breakthrough for me. I actually ordered them on my own the last night. However, I assure you all that I still do not like red tomatoes.

I'll upload all the pictures and add a link to the photo page soon. Also, I'm sure Rebecca--who is far more diligent with her blog than I-- will have lots of pictures as well. CLICK HERE for her blog Stained Glass. Also see pictures as the Arizona Outlaw blog is updated. There's some great pictures of the Hot Head that Rebecca took. CLICK HERE for Arizona Outlaw blog.


Sporting our gold medals... which look silver. We were assured that they were "Gold" in theory. Lots of people were looking at their "Gold" medals saying "These aren't Gold!" So we were content to sport them as is.


Rebecca posing for a picture with me while getting my scull ready to go.



Here's Dave finishing out the race.

Green Protest In the News... NOT!

While in London, Wanda and I came out of Lillywhites (sporting good store), to witness a protest march down Picadilly Street in London. I didn't have my camera so I ran all the way back to our hotel and then caught up with the protestors. Well at least some of the 10,000 or so marchers.

I'm sure this didn't even make the news in the U.S. Especially so close to an election here in the states...

I am somewhat of a "granola cruncher" and I think it's OK to actually care about our planet. I also would agree with these "Brits" that it's shameful for the U.S. to not take the Kyoto agreement seriously. And like them... I'm not very proud of our President and his anti-enviromental policies. Fortunately for me the protestors didn't mind me taking their pictures and I don't mind giving them a little press on my blog because I happen to agree them.

Hot Head Regatta 2006

Last Saturday I participated in the Hot Head Regatta on Tempe Town Lake. It's a 2.75 mile head race--which means it's a staggered start and best time wins. I rowed a double with fellow Arizona Outlaw, Kathy Moum, and we won our Master Women's 2x race in 20:34. I was also going to row in the single race but it was cancelled due to high winds. Although I think I could have handled the waves and probably the wind, I'm sure it would not have been a pleasant row. I was somewhat thankful that they cancelled. The Arizona Outlaws did well in all the sculling events. In fact, we placed first in all that we entered.

More Images from Burgundy

I finally got a chance to put some images up on a photo page from France. I took a cajillion, so I had to select just a few for the photo page. Some of the pictures look like they have a mist over them. That's because it was foggy for at least 3 days. The fog would usually burn off later in the day. Certainly, it made the old chateaus look more mystifying. To get to the photo page CLICK HERE

Below are a few more added to the blog. Next week, I'm off to London with Wanda and then onto Louisiana for my rowing marathon. So check back soon for more travel pictures.


Pretty berries on a bush outside the apartment.


Mmmmmmmmm, fromage (stinky cheese). No one does stinky cheese like the French. This was taken at a local market where Wanda and I gathered fresh goodies for and evening meal.


A view of the apartment from the road. We had a vineyard as the front yard. Merci to Joe and Susan Howe for going on vacation to let us have the run of the place.

Bon Jour and Au Revoir!

Today we are leaving Paris for the States. We spent a week traveling around the beautiful French countryside. Very rural with lots of little villages within a few kilometers of each other. As we were in wine country, half the enjoyment was being able to drive up to farm houses with the sign "Cave" (French for cellar) and "digustation" (for tasting) and try out the local wines. So many great wines and a shame we can only bring 2 bottles back each. The only mishaps of the trip were transport related (rental car/s). The first day our auto had a flat and the last day the NEW Ford S-max mini-van just turned off on a highway exit and wouldn't restart. We were in a rural area-- so it was a long day of waiting for tow truck, taxi's and re-renting. All a learning experience for sure and I learned quickly how to talk to non English speaking policemen through broken French and sign language. Wanda was a good interpreter throughout the trip. I really think if she stayed another month or so she would be speaking fluently.

Below are a couple pictures of our trip. I'll post a picture page when we get home. Au Revoir France! Bon Jour U.S.A.


One of the farms we drove up and did a tasting. Not very far away from the apartment we stayed at.


Wanda was quite happy to go wine tasting in the area of Chardonnay.


Here's Wanda's next house.


Matt at a tasting place where they have Brouilly wines (grapes from the area of Mont Brouilly and Beaujolais). Definitely our favorites. We would have loved to be able to ship home cases, however, the cost was prohibitive.

Kick In The Pants...

A shopper's woeful story.

I hardly think that I'm so weird shaped that the clothing industry would spite me. However, after spending to much time actually shopping and trying on pants, I'm convinced that the current pant styles were designed by the fashion devil.

E goes shopping.
I started out with high hopes since it seemed all my pants from the previous year were a bit loose (from all the rowing I've been doing). I actually had visions of the perfectly fit, cute, pinstriped pants that would look snappy with a cute sweater set. I can see myself in them--sipping a glass of wine in a French café. And wouldn't it be cool if I could actually find more than one pair and at a reasonable price?

First stop: Kohls
After all, I did find a bitch'in pair of dressy Capris there last year that fit me perfect. Surely, they would have a similar style in a long pant. WRONG! My J-Lo butt and smaller waist created the perfect gap for someone to toss some peanut shells down my backside if I actually sat down in them. "No biggie, just get a smaller size" .... WRONG again. The waist was still to big and my legs looked like two sausages stuffed inside. I thought "Maybe a little liposuction would make them look better". Anyone that knows me, knows that would be a totally against my "love yourself for who you are" attitude. Luckily, I came back from the dark side to remind myself that I could have several pairs of pants tailor made for a lot less.

Next Stop: Macy's
Ahhhhhh a department store with lots of different designers and brands of pants. This has to be the place. SOMEBODY must have designed a pair of pants just for me. I immediately went to the petite section a.k.a. "short person section" and lo and behold--cute, gray, and black pinstriped pants! God, I hope they fit... they were exactly like my pre-shopping vision. Just to be sure, I picked up several different styles and practically skipped to the dressing room. With 10 pairs of different pants, the sales lady was concerned that I didn't have tops to try on with them. I assured her that I was doing focused shopping. I would NOT be able to move onto tops until I found the perfect pants.

"How are you doing in there?" I heard after trying on 5 pairs and with the 6th pair half pulled on. "I'm not quite sure" I replied. This must have perplexed her as there was a long, long pause. "Is there another size I can get you?". Guess it was better that she didn't say ".... BIGGER size".

To make a way to long time in that dressing room short... NADA! Not one stinking pair of pinstriped pants regardless of size looked right. Had to be the bad lighting and the mirrors. Dejected, I carried out all 10 pairs and put them on the "These looked like crap on me" rack.


Last Stop: Talbot's
Talbot's is hit or miss with me. Sometimes they seem to carry way to many "old lady" clothes. Granted I'm heading to middle age in a month, but who says I have to start dressing like it. In Talbot's defense--sometimes they have some cute, nicely fitting stuff. Which they may have had.... if I had actually tried anything on. For some reason I couldn't see myself paying $128 dollars for one pair of pants. Besides, I'm sure my spouse would use it as ammo for the next 10 years. I can see it now "We could have retired by now if you hadn't bought those $128 pair of pants..." or "We had to refinance our house, just so you could buy the top to go with those pants". Those of you with spouses know exactly what I'm talking about.

I left Talbot's and in my mind I started to wonder if starving for a couple of weeks would do the trick. Better think that out. So I sat down to rest the hamstring I had pulled trying to get out of a pair of pants in Macy's. I people watched or I guess I should say I watched other women and took note of what their pants looked like. Then it dawned on me--they ALL looked like they stuffed sausages (with the exception of one chick who looked like she had been starving herself for more than a couple of weeks)!

So what's with the story fatty pants?
Did you say that or was that my "inner E"? Regardless, the pant shopping experience made me realize that one can't get down on oneself but one can "dis" the fashion designer devils who are trying to tell us that this crap actually looks good. Who the hell are they designing for anyway? Even J-Lo's Jeans look like *#@% on a J-Lo figured girl. What's up with that?

I've given up on my perfect pant thoughts for now. If I'm not thinking or looking, maybe the fashion fairy will appear and turn a full fashion circle to show me how great they look. Then with a wave of a wand make them appear at a store close by with a tiny price tag attached.

p.s. If your ass hasn't been chewed off and you've found a pair of pants to fit over it that looks good--I want to hear from you! If you're a size 2 or 0 and everything looks good on you then I BETTER NOT hear from you (Yeah, that means YOU--Audrey and Wanda. Your day will come. A designer with a big tush is gonna get even).